The things that are done by  a don
We may look dry and dusty
But under the gown you will find a clown
Whose game for anything lusty

We make jokes that are
Legal, classical even chemical
Oh the things, the bad, bad things
That are done by a Don, Don, Don

Theado Potts, we acknowledge
He's the daredevil of the college
Look at the way he romps and roysters
Swallows the oysters in, the cloisters

The principal had some people say
A whale of a time on founders day
And if we are to believe the rumour
Nellie lost her sense of humour

Oh the things that are done by  a Don
Are things that a Don didn't oughta
If you want to cram for a Latin exam
Just visit our ?? quarter

Turkish coffee just for the smell of it
Cocoa parties just for the hell of it
Oh the things, the bad, bad things
That are done by a Don, Don, Don

Oh the things, the bad, bad things
That are done by a Don, Don, Don
